I wrote this back in 2006 on the anniversary of my mother's passing. I post it again today for two reasons: I felt I wanted to read it anew and this blog represents a fruition of this little piece. The last line "No one escapes the sweep of history" set a course for the way I understand history, not as a discipline but as a phenomenon of life; as a thing beyond us and from which we cannot escape (except through death of course). In this sense, one could almost use life and history interchangeably.
"...death is a part of life it's something we're all destined to do" -Ms. Gump
Have you ever asked yourself "how will I survive" after thus and such? The actual dynamic of your own experience is relative, of course, but the question is what's important, especially in the context of the loved one gone forever. In anticipation of a life-wrenching event we most always (at least I do) assume we'll either lose our mind or come eerily close to it. But I've come to learn that we humans have phenomenal capacity; that what we often see as insurmountable, in the end, turns out to be our greatest achievement and reason for renewing and becoming.
Six years ago I posed myself that question and not to my surprise my answer was "I can't." Well, here I am and of course I could! It's like in the bible when someone is blessed with the occasion of meeting God. The inevitable result is a different person with a new name and a new physical price to pay, like Jacob (now Israel) who limped ever after. Many are on this side of that occasion and many, like myself, were cast headlong over the event-horizon into that most bitter black hole. As often happens, profound beauty is tempered with the base alloy of tragedy and for me the phrase life goes on fits well within this precept. Life went on without her and still life pushes on with or without us. The best thing I have found to make the emptiness bearable is the radiance and immutability of memory for it is this that makes immortality possible. I must not douse the flame of her memory with the ocean of my sadness. No one escapes the sweep of history!
"In [my] stream of consciousness there's a river crying...You took away my hero will you take away my pain?...I'll carry on the best that I can without you here beside me" JP
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Monday, February 22, 2010
Tom's Bumper Sticker Idea
I'm taking this over from one of my favorite blogs *The Musings of Thomas Verenna* (whose link you'll find to the right) because I think it's a great idea and I have his permission to do so! He writes,
Be fruitful and multiply O grand idea!
EAIII
I think that people should get bumper stickers for being wrong about things to brighten the mood a little. “I backed the wrong horse” will do fine. You can personalize it too: “I Backed the Wrong Horse: The World Will End in 2000″ or “I Backed the Wrong Horse: I Voted for Bush.”
Be fruitful and multiply O grand idea!
EAIII
Monday, February 15, 2010
The Road Ahead
It is an interesting experience to be sure. I had always figured to write a blog one must read a blog. And so before venturing into this, my first blog, I took it upon myself to see what was out there. Invariably, I came across many blogs that I thoroughly enjoyed only to find at reading's end that the last post was from a year ago! Time and again I have come across this experience and been left feeling shorted. Because, again, I enjoyed the writing.
My point is, it has been a month since my last post and it bothers me that one may have an experience, such as I have had on occasion, on my very own blog. Suffice it to say that because I've not written doesn't mean I'm not thinking about writing. And so, I wanted to update readers of this blog about various themes that have piqued my interest; themes that will constitute my blog posts for the coming months.
I've mentioned before that my primary reading experience has been within Christian origins, New Test. literature and so-called 2nd Temple Judaism. Obviously, the literature surrounding this subject has had a long history and is quite vast. So currently there is a lot of situation work being done; that is, trying to situate what we've learned in the last fifty years within the overall history of the field (i.e. relationship between newly translated texts like the Dead Sea scrolls or those found at Nag Hammadi and Christian origins, etc). It seems to me that kind of epistemology, as it were, is difficult to set aside. So as I turn to look at South Texas history, I can only conclude that my views are colored by this experience.
Theme I
Tejano historiography has had a generative period. Although it is but a slice of overall Chicano history, it has proved as formidable as any. Writers like Carlos E. Castaneda, Jovita Gonzalez, Felix D. Almaraz, Jr., Andres Tijerina, David Montejano and Jesus F. de la Teja (to name but a few) have set the foundation for all future work. They answered the call to establish the story of the Mexicans of Texas. Naturally, they set about articulating the roots from which the Tejanos grew. We can thank Drs. Castaneda and Tijerina (among others) for establishing clearly the Mexican aspect of Texas, that aspect of "change" that "the Anlgo-American underwent by the nineteenth century" for which "neither the plains nor the frontier could fully account." (Tijerina, 1994)
Chronicling, as it were, the Tejano emergence necessarily led to a focus on "the Tejano experience." This led to a full accounting of "Anglo attitudes toward Mexicans" in any given era of Texas history. Works by D. Montejano (Anglos & Mexicans in the Making of Texas) and A. De Leon (They Called Them Greasers) focused on shedding light on the issues. Additionally, providing a nuanced look into Tejano culture was a common concern. It seems to me that this remains the current situation: Seeking to solidify Tejano history and identity and desiring to bring the national civil rights movement to bare on the experiences of Mexicans in Texas with writings focused on racial and gender issues, particularly, but also with wider civil rights movements in mind.
So what's next? How does establishing our legitimate roots in Texas, chronicling racism and sexism, economic discrimination, political oppression and responses to that (LULAC, LA RAZA et al) inform our progression into the future? What does it mean to have successfully deconstructed a myth (Anglo superiority) and thereby construct a plausible future? Quite rightly, some have sought to transform the political process; by integrating what we know with what we do. As Montejano argues, racism becomes Racism when it is enacted by public policy. And so perhaps there is where we should focus our energies, as many have, on repairing, as it were, policy in education, health care, etc. This has been a long process, with failures, but many many successes as well.
Theme II
From the beginning I wanted to focus on Kingsville history because, although there are works available, most of it is wholly centered on the KR and its families and legacy. There is something inherently right and useful about this, after all, works on the Kings and Klebergs are essential to our history. But I would like to emphasize that although Kingsville began with the KR it does not end with it. Rarely do the structures look like the foundations on which they are built. It is with that understanding in mind that I wish to contribute my writings.
So for example, literature on Kingsville has still do deal with what Montejano calls the "geography of race," that spacial demarcation that separated Anglo, Mexican and African Americans. Railroads may have been the hallmark of progress for many but for many more still it was an iron sign of the times. And although there has been a good measure of intergration among the Anglo/Hispanic community, it is clear the legacy haunts us still.
There is also the broad ethnic mix unique to a South Texas town because of TAMUK: among others, from China, India and Pakistan. Do they live in a vacuum? Surely not! One need only look at the business sector to see their impact. How do they impact the social complexion of this city? I'm not absolutely sure but it seems a rather unique situation for a small Texas town; one that has an immense potential to explore.
As you can tell this is situation type work on a personal level! I look forward to exploring these issues in the context of my rubric "existentialism, modernity and the sweep of history." It seems to me that these three experiences are at the very core of humanity. So as we thrust forth into a new millenium where does Kingsville or Texas and the literature that surrounds them fit into the globalism of our time? Do we simply fall into the general pattern taken by all borderland civilizations that live next to a marketable river; that is to say a pattern of conquest and accomodation (Egypt and the Nile, Rome and the Tiber, England and the Thames so, therefore, Texas and the Rio Grande?) or are we a unique set of traditions from a very specific historical and cultural lineage that must deal with rapidly changing times in a search for self-determination? It's a little of both; something every one of our ancestors lived through and endured.
One who just sighed,
EAIII
My point is, it has been a month since my last post and it bothers me that one may have an experience, such as I have had on occasion, on my very own blog. Suffice it to say that because I've not written doesn't mean I'm not thinking about writing. And so, I wanted to update readers of this blog about various themes that have piqued my interest; themes that will constitute my blog posts for the coming months.
I've mentioned before that my primary reading experience has been within Christian origins, New Test. literature and so-called 2nd Temple Judaism. Obviously, the literature surrounding this subject has had a long history and is quite vast. So currently there is a lot of situation work being done; that is, trying to situate what we've learned in the last fifty years within the overall history of the field (i.e. relationship between newly translated texts like the Dead Sea scrolls or those found at Nag Hammadi and Christian origins, etc). It seems to me that kind of epistemology, as it were, is difficult to set aside. So as I turn to look at South Texas history, I can only conclude that my views are colored by this experience.
Theme I
Tejano historiography has had a generative period. Although it is but a slice of overall Chicano history, it has proved as formidable as any. Writers like Carlos E. Castaneda, Jovita Gonzalez, Felix D. Almaraz, Jr., Andres Tijerina, David Montejano and Jesus F. de la Teja (to name but a few) have set the foundation for all future work. They answered the call to establish the story of the Mexicans of Texas. Naturally, they set about articulating the roots from which the Tejanos grew. We can thank Drs. Castaneda and Tijerina (among others) for establishing clearly the Mexican aspect of Texas, that aspect of "change" that "the Anlgo-American underwent by the nineteenth century" for which "neither the plains nor the frontier could fully account." (Tijerina, 1994)
Chronicling, as it were, the Tejano emergence necessarily led to a focus on "the Tejano experience." This led to a full accounting of "Anglo attitudes toward Mexicans" in any given era of Texas history. Works by D. Montejano (Anglos & Mexicans in the Making of Texas) and A. De Leon (They Called Them Greasers) focused on shedding light on the issues. Additionally, providing a nuanced look into Tejano culture was a common concern. It seems to me that this remains the current situation: Seeking to solidify Tejano history and identity and desiring to bring the national civil rights movement to bare on the experiences of Mexicans in Texas with writings focused on racial and gender issues, particularly, but also with wider civil rights movements in mind.
So what's next? How does establishing our legitimate roots in Texas, chronicling racism and sexism, economic discrimination, political oppression and responses to that (LULAC, LA RAZA et al) inform our progression into the future? What does it mean to have successfully deconstructed a myth (Anglo superiority) and thereby construct a plausible future? Quite rightly, some have sought to transform the political process; by integrating what we know with what we do. As Montejano argues, racism becomes Racism when it is enacted by public policy. And so perhaps there is where we should focus our energies, as many have, on repairing, as it were, policy in education, health care, etc. This has been a long process, with failures, but many many successes as well.
Theme II
From the beginning I wanted to focus on Kingsville history because, although there are works available, most of it is wholly centered on the KR and its families and legacy. There is something inherently right and useful about this, after all, works on the Kings and Klebergs are essential to our history. But I would like to emphasize that although Kingsville began with the KR it does not end with it. Rarely do the structures look like the foundations on which they are built. It is with that understanding in mind that I wish to contribute my writings.
So for example, literature on Kingsville has still do deal with what Montejano calls the "geography of race," that spacial demarcation that separated Anglo, Mexican and African Americans. Railroads may have been the hallmark of progress for many but for many more still it was an iron sign of the times. And although there has been a good measure of intergration among the Anglo/Hispanic community, it is clear the legacy haunts us still.
There is also the broad ethnic mix unique to a South Texas town because of TAMUK: among others, from China, India and Pakistan. Do they live in a vacuum? Surely not! One need only look at the business sector to see their impact. How do they impact the social complexion of this city? I'm not absolutely sure but it seems a rather unique situation for a small Texas town; one that has an immense potential to explore.
As you can tell this is situation type work on a personal level! I look forward to exploring these issues in the context of my rubric "existentialism, modernity and the sweep of history." It seems to me that these three experiences are at the very core of humanity. So as we thrust forth into a new millenium where does Kingsville or Texas and the literature that surrounds them fit into the globalism of our time? Do we simply fall into the general pattern taken by all borderland civilizations that live next to a marketable river; that is to say a pattern of conquest and accomodation (Egypt and the Nile, Rome and the Tiber, England and the Thames so, therefore, Texas and the Rio Grande?) or are we a unique set of traditions from a very specific historical and cultural lineage that must deal with rapidly changing times in a search for self-determination? It's a little of both; something every one of our ancestors lived through and endured.
One who just sighed,
EAIII
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