A South Texan explores existentialism, modernity and the sweep of history.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

You Give Love A Bad Meme


I feel misogynistic in a poetic sense of the word. Like a cry against existence...

A turn against the fire of creation in a quest to stop the madness. I see the news and there is nothing but sadness in a world devoid of gladness. Why do we stake our claims on badness?

I feel misogynistic in a poetic sense of the word. Like a cry against existence...

Ennui is the chatter-Left? Right? Center? FINE!
But can see the tatter?
You're too old to thrive on flatter.
That's why you can't see what's the matter!

I feel misogynistic in a poetic sense of the word. Like a cry against existence...

Is this the message you want to send that neighborliness has no friend? Even Sodom & Gomorrah went that trend and we all know that fantastic end! Given our past, what I fear around the bend is a future we cannot defend!

I feel misogynistic in a poetic sense of the word. Like a cry against existence...

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Dr. Ferguson Lecture


Texas A & M University-Kingsville's Annual Faculty Lecture will be held tonight at the Irma Rangel College of Pharmacy BLDG Room 115.

The lecture is called "Shadow Work" and the Making of the Modern World by Dr. Dean T. Ferguson, professor of history at TAMUK

"Factory workers were documented in labor history, guild members were noted in the history of the early modern period. These 'shadow workers' have hardly been mentioned at all."

"One of the main things I want people to leave the lecture with is an awareness of the variety of informal sector work that happens all around them."

"I also want them to learn that much of what we know about industrialization and the rise of the west is incomprehensible without these workers..."

"...I want the attendees to see that there are distinct parallels between today's informal sector and the shadow work of the 18th and 19th Centuries."

(Quotes cited from The Kingsville Record April 18, 2010 5A)

I will be attending this lecture. I will post some thoughts later.

EAIII

Monday, April 19, 2010

A Voice Amid the Wilderness


The most enduring image from the series Genesis: A Living Conversation is the image of the trapeze artist. While discussing faith and the story of Jacob, Roberta Hestenes mentions the image of the trapeze artist and how it informed her sense of faith. She said faith is not the fairly safe climb up the ladder or even the precarious swinging. It is when the moment comes to release from the safety and security of the swing and being willing, gutsy, and courageous enough to let go and take the hand of your partner on the other side.

This blog thing is a bit overwhelming, especially within the terms I've set. It is a cute little paradox too. A blog, by its very nature (given the time we live in) is daily and organic. The topics I've chosen to write about, on the other hand, require a lot of research. And given my procrastinatory nature, this could take months ;) Hence, the paradox: a blog languishing in research! Many times I've wanted to write something and have talked myself out of it because it doesn't fit the stated criteria. This is absurd! And it can no longer continue.

The best part of a blog is the dailiness of it and the willingness to be prolific! I do not want to create an online dairy but I do want to have a storehouse of thought. A narrative of my life even; I can't do that if I focus the blog so much that it misses large portions of my life. So this is me today, trying to find a voice in the bloggosphere. Trying to traverse the worlds of history and music and drumming to find a unified voice. My personal unified field theory.

This is where I let go of the swing ready to catch the hands of my readers.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Ghost From Writings Past

I wrote this back in 2006 on the anniversary of my mother's passing. I post it again today for two reasons: I felt I wanted to read it anew and this blog represents a fruition of this little piece. The last line "No one escapes the sweep of history" set a course for the way I understand history, not as a discipline but as a phenomenon of life; as a thing beyond us and from which we cannot escape (except through death of course). In this sense, one could almost use life and history interchangeably.

"...death is a part of life it's something we're all destined to do" -Ms. Gump

Have you ever asked yourself "how will I survive" after thus and such? The actual dynamic of your own experience is relative, of course, but the question is what's important, especially in the context of the loved one gone forever. In anticipation of a life-wrenching event we most always (at least I do) assume we'll either lose our mind or come eerily close to it. But I've come to learn that we humans have phenomenal capacity; that what we often see as insurmountable, in the end, turns out to be our greatest achievement and reason for renewing and becoming.

Six years ago I posed myself that question and not to my surprise my answer was "I can't." Well, here I am and of course I could! It's like in the bible when someone is blessed with the occasion of meeting God. The inevitable result is a different person with a new name and a new physical price to pay, like Jacob (now Israel) who limped ever after. Many are on this side of that occasion and many, like myself, were cast headlong over the event-horizon into that most bitter black hole. As often happens, profound beauty is tempered with the base alloy of tragedy and for me the phrase life goes on fits well within this precept. Life went on without her and still life pushes on with or without us. The best thing I have found to make the emptiness bearable is the radiance and immutability of memory for it is this that makes immortality possible. I must not douse the flame of her memory with the ocean of my sadness. No one escapes the sweep of history!

"In [my] stream of consciousness there's a river crying...You took away my hero will you take away my pain?...I'll carry on the best that I can without you here beside me" JP

Monday, February 22, 2010

Tom's Bumper Sticker Idea

I'm taking this over from one of my favorite blogs *The Musings of Thomas Verenna* (whose link you'll find to the right) because I think it's a great idea and I have his permission to do so! He writes,
I think that people should get bumper stickers for being wrong about things to brighten the mood a little. “I backed the wrong horse” will do fine. You can personalize it too: “I Backed the Wrong Horse: The World Will End in 2000″ or “I Backed the Wrong Horse: I Voted for Bush.”

Be fruitful and multiply O grand idea!

EAIII

Monday, February 15, 2010

The Road Ahead

It is an interesting experience to be sure. I had always figured to write a blog one must read a blog. And so before venturing into this, my first blog, I took it upon myself to see what was out there. Invariably, I came across many blogs that I thoroughly enjoyed only to find at reading's end that the last post was from a year ago! Time and again I have come across this experience and been left feeling shorted. Because, again, I enjoyed the writing.

My point is, it has been a month since my last post and it bothers me that one may have an experience, such as I have had on occasion, on my very own blog. Suffice it to say that because I've not written doesn't mean I'm not thinking about writing. And so, I wanted to update readers of this blog about various themes that have piqued my interest; themes that will constitute my blog posts for the coming months.

I've mentioned before that my primary reading experience has been within Christian origins, New Test. literature and so-called 2nd Temple Judaism. Obviously, the literature surrounding this subject has had a long history and is quite vast. So currently there is a lot of situation work being done; that is, trying to situate what we've learned in the last fifty years within the overall history of the field (i.e. relationship between newly translated texts like the Dead Sea scrolls or those found at Nag Hammadi and Christian origins, etc). It seems to me that kind of epistemology, as it were, is difficult to set aside. So as I turn to look at South Texas history, I can only conclude that my views are colored by this experience.

Theme I

Tejano historiography has had a generative period. Although it is but a slice of overall Chicano history, it has proved as formidable as any. Writers like Carlos E. Castaneda, Jovita Gonzalez, Felix D. Almaraz, Jr., Andres Tijerina, David Montejano and Jesus F. de la Teja (to name but a few) have set the foundation for all future work. They answered the call to establish the story of the Mexicans of Texas. Naturally, they set about articulating the roots from which the Tejanos grew. We can thank Drs. Castaneda and Tijerina (among others) for establishing clearly the Mexican aspect of Texas, that aspect of "change" that "the Anlgo-American underwent by the nineteenth century" for which "neither the plains nor the frontier could fully account." (Tijerina, 1994)

Chronicling, as it were, the Tejano emergence necessarily led to a focus on "the Tejano experience." This led to a full accounting of "Anglo attitudes toward Mexicans" in any given era of Texas history. Works by D. Montejano (Anglos & Mexicans in the Making of Texas) and A. De Leon (They Called Them Greasers) focused on shedding light on the issues. Additionally, providing a nuanced look into Tejano culture was a common concern. It seems to me that this remains the current situation: Seeking to solidify Tejano history and identity and desiring to bring the national civil rights movement to bare on the experiences of Mexicans in Texas with writings focused on racial and gender issues, particularly, but also with wider civil rights movements in mind.

So what's next? How does establishing our legitimate roots in Texas, chronicling racism and sexism, economic discrimination, political oppression and responses to that (LULAC, LA RAZA et al) inform our progression into the future? What does it mean to have successfully deconstructed a myth (Anglo superiority) and thereby construct a plausible future? Quite rightly, some have sought to transform the political process; by integrating what we know with what we do. As Montejano argues, racism becomes Racism when it is enacted by public policy. And so perhaps there is where we should focus our energies, as many have, on repairing, as it were, policy in education, health care, etc. This has been a long process, with failures, but many many successes as well.

Theme II

From the beginning I wanted to focus on Kingsville history because, although there are works available, most of it is wholly centered on the KR and its families and legacy. There is something inherently right and useful about this, after all, works on the Kings and Klebergs are essential to our history. But I would like to emphasize that although Kingsville began with the KR it does not end with it. Rarely do the structures look like the foundations on which they are built. It is with that understanding in mind that I wish to contribute my writings.

So for example, literature on Kingsville has still do deal with what Montejano calls the "geography of race," that spacial demarcation that separated Anglo, Mexican and African Americans. Railroads may have been the hallmark of progress for many but for many more still it was an iron sign of the times. And although there has been a good measure of intergration among the Anglo/Hispanic community, it is clear the legacy haunts us still.
There is also the broad ethnic mix unique to a South Texas town because of TAMUK: among others, from China, India and Pakistan. Do they live in a vacuum? Surely not! One need only look at the business sector to see their impact. How do they impact the social complexion of this city? I'm not absolutely sure but it seems a rather unique situation for a small Texas town; one that has an immense potential to explore.

As you can tell this is situation type work on a personal level! I look forward to exploring these issues in the context of my rubric "existentialism, modernity and the sweep of history." It seems to me that these three experiences are at the very core of humanity. So as we thrust forth into a new millenium where does Kingsville or Texas and the literature that surrounds them fit into the globalism of our time? Do we simply fall into the general pattern taken by all borderland civilizations that live next to a marketable river; that is to say a pattern of conquest and accomodation (Egypt and the Nile, Rome and the Tiber, England and the Thames so, therefore, Texas and the Rio Grande?) or are we a unique set of traditions from a very specific historical and cultural lineage that must deal with rapidly changing times in a search for self-determination? It's a little of both; something every one of our ancestors lived through and endured.

One who just sighed,

EAIII

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

The Distant Voice of my Mother



A most vivid memory I have of childhood are two bedtime poems my mother would sing to me. They are very short, only a few lines each, but along with the Our Father, these are the words I'd hear as I drifted into sleep.
ALLA ESTA LA LUNA

COMIENDO SU TUNA

TIRANDO LAS CASCARAS

EN UNA LAGUNA

This was more of a spoken poem but it had a definite melody to it.
In terms of form, it's a basic AABA rhyming pattern (i.e. Luna-Tuna-Cascaras-Laguna). The melody and cadence were accentuated by use of the elongated "U" (i.e. Luuuna-Tuuuna...Laguuuna) So it would sound like this:
ALLA ESTA LA LUUUNA

COMIENDO SU TUUUNA

TIRANDO LAS CASCARAS

EN UNA LAGUUUNA

To clarify, the word tuna refers to the bright red fruit that a nopal produces.

The other was more of a melodic jingle. It is more upbeat and jovial and I would consider it to be more kid friendly. The lyrics are as follows:
QUIEN ES EL QUE ANDO AQUI?

FUE CRI-CRI, FUE CRI-CRI.

Y QUIEN ES ESE SENIOR?

EL GRIO CANTOR!

The use of "cri-cri" is a reference to the song of a cricket. Merely reading the words gives a sense of the melody of the jingle. Incidentally, this was my first encounter with odd musical phrasing. The very last line "el grio cantor" is a stark triplet feel that abruptly breaks the 2/4 cadence of the jingle.

I don't know the origin of these song/poems. I imagine they are connected with ranch life as their spacial focus is nature, i.e the moon and the crickets. But that is pure speculation. I once received an email about them. The details of this person are lost to me now, as this was a few years ago, but she wrote to me and asked me about these songs. She too had grown up with them and had not heard them since childhood!